Tuning in to my feelings: my north star to a career change

Feelings. Let's face it, they can be pretty unsettling sometimes.

When redundancy hit at the end of 2019, I dusted myself down and started job hunting for another role in the publishing industry.

What I hadn’t banked on was a perfect storm of feelings that completely derailed my plans to secure said job and eventually led to a career change.

First there was the way job adverts were making me feel. I realised that something was ‘off’, that I was having a visceral reaction to them. On paper I was a viable candidate but I just could not muster any enthusiasm for them. Put simply, I was applying for jobs I could do but realised I was just going through the motions.

My dad died and with that came a flood of emotions and a real sense that life was too short not to be doing something I enjoyed. Dad had been a bit of an explorer - someone who hadn’t been afraid to live his life and loved the Great Outdoors. I needed to channel some of his adventurous spirit.

Last but not least, there was Covid and the economic impact of lockdowns. Companies that had offered me interviews retreated citing hiring freezes and after a protracted job search and many unresponsive recruiters, I was demoralised and exhausted. Years ago, I would have diligently persisted but I knew I had had enough.

I needed a rethink.

What followed was much introspection to fully understand what motivated me now, as opposed to what had motivated me 20 years ago. And that `something’ had to be more people oriented than the commercially driven roles I had been in. Cliched though it may sound, I needed to make a difference and my need for job fulfilment suddenly came sharply in to focus.

Exhaustion, lack of motivation, a midlife realisation that life was passing me by, a need to do something meaningful, something more human: these feelings were such powerful indictors of where I should go, how I should proceed.

Whilst my head was pulling me in one direction, my inner compass was guiding me to a destination I had never imagined possible.

So I started to really tune in to it and take steps to pursue a more fulfilling path and create the kind of work life I wanted.

To cut a very long story short, over the next four years I retrained to be a counsellor and now run my own private practice.

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Prioritising feelings in your job search can feel like a risky strategy. After all, it’s so much easier to stick with what you know and to develop an existing career path.

But if ignoring your feelings leaves you neglecting your need for personal growth and pursuing the same old, then isn’t it time to make a change?    

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Tuning in to my feelings had a knock-on effect.

I got clarity on my values. I started to understand what mattered to me – in my case working in a more human-oriented profession and knowing that I thrived working one-to-one. I also realised that I was performing better at placement interviews because my values were more closely aligned with the roles I was seeking to fill and a more authentic version of myself was beginning to show.

With this newfound sense of self and values, I became motivated by pursuing a counselling career. Investing in this felt energising and empowering. I knew my chosen career path would value my cumulative experiences, as opposed to pursuing an existing path that may tick some of my boxes but that may limit scope for personal development.

Lastly, I became focussed on my end goal of launching my own private practice because I was clear that part of the reason I had burnt out working for a large company was that I felt powerless to affect change and make a real difference. Becoming a self-employed counsellor would allow me to work on a deeper level with people and put me firmly back in control of my work life, which in turn would improve my wellbeing. 

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Following my north star has been far from the easiest option. It has meant part-time work to finance my counselling course and a degree of uncertainty about whether I could make a living from my new career path.

And whilst my business is in its infancy and my income is some way off the levels it once was, I can see a more sustainable work life ahead of me – one which puts me in control.

Crucially, I absolutely love the work I am doing with my clients: it is in equal measures enriching, challenging and humbling.

So whilst all those feelings may have seemed disruptive at the time, tuning in to them has been an amazing catalyst for change. To ignore them would have been to quash a real need for growth and renewal.

A diploma qualified, integrative counsellor and registered member of the BACP, Sarah brings over 20 years’ experience of a variety of work cultures to her counselling practice, Confido Counselling, which has a focus on workplace wellbeing.

To book a free introductory call or to book an appointment, please contact: sarah@confidocounselling.co.uk